What is it with men and big muscles and chiseled features anyway. What do they gain with all the increase in brawn and lean meat? Is the health they’re after? Or is it the increase in popularity? Or is it to check out hot hunks in the gym? (Bunch of gay men? Who knows…)

Whatever the reason may be, they freak and annoy me to no end. Okay I’m being too biased, I only hate those guys that are upstairs. You see above my office is a gym. And worse, MY part of the office seems to be directly under the weight lifting section of the Gym. So all day long I have to endure the grunts and huff of buff guys as they try to lift a barbell nearly half their weight—or almost equivalent to mine. And I get scared out of my wits as I hear the thuds and crash as they let go of  their heavy burden that is really too heavy for them too carry. It’s as if I hear their pecotralis majors and biceps (I’m a nurse, so sue me for the jargon) screaming in anguish as they try to make lift those things way above their heads.

Don’t they know that downstairs, a thin, scrawny geek has a myocardial infarction (Heart Attack--sounds a lot cooler) every time they just suddenly drop their weights. Don’t they think that if they added a little bit more force that they could crack the thin cement floor separating our two confined worlds and cause mayhem and destruction to my office.

Okay, I’m just too paranoid…

I don’t really hate buff guys per se. It’s just that aside from good health—which you can get some other way—what do you achieve by trying to carry around a weight equivalent to your dear old mommy?

I actually dream of a chiseled six pack, but I like my scrawny, geeky look thank you very much. They say I look kinda cute (I think with emphasis on the “kinda” which was just thrown their so as not to embarrass me) with my get up. To me it looks like a cross between an anime look and emo get-up.

And speaking of emo…what is emo really? Wikipedia says it’s just a fashion or subgenre of punk and sometimes goth. That it can be associated to fashion, attitude, and music. That emo is a shortening of overly emotional teenagers who wallow in self-pity and despair.

Whatever.

Whatever emo is, I like their genre of songs. If you look to your left, just below the tag board you will see (yup, you noticed, oh my god congratulations) the lyrics of my current LSS (Last Song Syndrome). It’s entitled—if you can read—The Last Song Ever (no pun intended) by Second Hand Serenade. If you’ve got limewire or any software to download songs on the net with, I highly suggest this artist (yup, he’s solo too… like most emo songwriters). It’s like Dashboard Confessionals, only raw—as in raw, r-a-w.

And who says I’m a geek huh? Huh? Huh? Okay, I confess. I am and damn proud of it too. I won’t say that I didn’t think of having a buff bod once or twice. But I’m perfectly happy with the way I look now-sans the excess flab on my love handles that I am so desperately trying to shake off.

So, do I look geeky, emo, anime-ish. Whatever.

All I know is, I’m scared to death at the thought of the ceiling collapsing on top of me. That I might just find myself underneath a buff guy with parts of what used to the ceiling office flying everywhere around me.

Yep, I’m scared.

-Robert